We Are Still Married by Garrison Keillor

EXCERPT:  How To Write a Letter 

from Garrison Keillor's book 'We Are Still Married' 

We shy persons need to write a letter now and then, or else we'll dry up and blow away. It's true. And I speak as one who loves to reach for the phone, dial the number, and talk. I say, "Big Bopper here - what's shakin', babes?" The telephone is to shyness what Hawaii is to February, it's a way out of the woods, and yet: a letter is better.

Such a sweet gift - a piece of handmade writing, in an envelope that is not a bill, sitting in our friend's path when she trudges home from a long day spent among wahoos and savages, a day our words will help repair. They don't need to be immortal, just sincere. She can read them twice and again tomorrow: You're someone I care about, Corrine, and think of often and every time I do you make me smile.

We need to write, otherwise nobody will know who we are. They will have only a vague impression of us as A Nice Person, because, frankly, we don't shine at conversation, we lack the confidence to thrust our faces forward and say, "Hi! I'm Heather Hooten; let me tell you about my week." Mostly we say "Uh-huh" and "Oh, really." People smile and look over our shoulder, looking for someone else to meet.

So a shy person sits down and writes a letter. To be known by another person - to meet and talk freely on the page - to be close despite distance. To escape from anonymity and be our own sweet selves and express the music of our souls.

Same thing that moves a giant rock star to sing his heart out in front of 123,000 people moves us to take a ballpoint in hand and write a few lines to our dear Aunt Eleanor. We want to be known. We want her to know that we have fallen in love, that we quit our job, that we're moving to New York, and we want to say a few things that might not get said in casual conversation: Thank you for what you've meant to me, I'm very happy right now.

The first step in writing letters is to get over the guilt of not writing. You don't "owe" anybody a letter. Letters are a gift. The burning shame you feel when you see unanswered mail makes it harder to pick up a pen and makes for a cheerless letter when you finally do. I feel bad about not writing, but I've been so busy, etc. Skip this. Few letters are obligatory, and they are Thanks for the wonderful gift and I am terribly sorry to hear about George's death and Yes, you're welcome to stay with us next month, and not many more than that. Write those promptly if you want to keep your friends. Don't worry about the others, except love letters, of course. When your true love writes, Dear Light of My Life, Joy of My Heart, O Lovely Pulsating Core of My Sensate Life, some response is called for.

Some of the best letters are tossed off in a burst of inspiration, so keep your writing stuff in one place where you can sit down for a few minutes and (Dear Roy, I am in the middle of a book entitled We Are Still Married but thought I'd drop you a line. Hi to your sweetie, too) dash off a note to a pal. Envelopes, stamps, address book, everything in a drawer so you can write fast when the pen is hot.

A blank white eight-by-eleven sheet can look as big as Montana if the pen's not so hot - try a smaller page and write boldly. Or use a note card with a piece of fine art on the front; if your letter ain't good, at least they get the Matisse. Get a pen that makes a sensuous line, get a comfortable typewriter, a friendly word processor - whichever feels easy to the hand.

Sit for a few minutes with the blank sheet in front of you, and meditate on the person you will write to, let your friend come to mind until you can almost see her or him in the room with you. Remember the last time you saw each other and how your friend looked and what you said and what perhaps was unsaid between you, and when your friend becomes real to you, start to write.

Write the salutation - Dear You - and take a deep breath and plunge in. A simple declarative sentence will do, followed by another and another and another. Tell us what you're doing and tell it like you were talking to us. Don't think about grammar, don't think about lit'ry style, don't try to write dramatically, just give us your news. Where did you go, who did you see, what did they say, what do you think?

If you don't know where to begin, start with the present moment: I'm sitting at the kitchen table on a rainy Saturday morning. Everyone is gone and the house is quiet. Let your simple description of the present moment lead to something else, let the letter drift gently along.

The toughest letter to crank out is one that is meant to impress, as we all know from writing job applications; if it's hard work to slip off a letter to a friend, maybe you're trying too hard to be terrific. A letter is only a report to someone who already likes you for reasons other than your brilliance. Take it easy.

Don't worry about form. It's not a term paper. When you come to the end of one episode, just start a new paragraph. You can go from a few lines about the sad state of pro football to your fond memories of Mexico to your cat's urinary tract infection to a few thoughts on personal indebtedness and on to the kitchen sink and what's in it. The more you write, the easier it gets, and when you have a True True Friend to write to, a compadre, a soul sibling, then it's like driving a car down a country road, you just get behind the keyboard and press on the gas.

Don't tear up the page and start over when you write a bad line - try to write your way out of it. Make mistakes and plunge on. Let the letter cook along and let yourself be bold. Outrage, confusion, love - whatever is in your mind, let it find a way on to the page. Writing is a means of discovery, always, and when you come to the end and write Yours ever or Hugs and kisses, you'll know something you didn't when you wrote Dear Pal.

Probably your friend will put your letter away, and it'll be read again a few years from now - and it will improve with age. And forty years from now, your friend's grandkids will dig it out of the attic and read it, a sweet and precious relic of the ancient eighties that gives them a sudden clear glimpse of you and her and the world we old-timers knew. You will then have created an object of art. Your simple lines about where you went, who you saw, what they said, will speak to those children and they will feel in their hearts the humanity of our times.

You can't pick up a phone and call the future and tell them about our times. You have to pick up a piece of paper.

PURCHASE the book 'We Are Still Married' >>>

Praise for the book:

“Garrison Keillor made it possible, after twenty years of black humor…to be both funny and nice, hip and winsome, scathing and loving, all in the flick of a single many-barbed quip——The Washington Post Book World

“Keillor’s literary style is as flexible and assured as his vocal delivery. It can slip from mood to mood so subtly and quickly you’re never quite sure where you are…. [His] writing has the silvery slip of running water, so graceful and easy it’s hard to believe it can carry so much that is jagged and unresolved. His integrity lies in his not smoothing away those rough edges in the swift current of his prose; they’re bruisingly, sometimes cuttingly there.” —The Village Voice


225 comments

  • Have been keen always on investing and have closely followed the developments in cryptocurrency. After selling our business two months ago, my spouse and I decided to put our savings into Bitcoin, believing it to be a lucrative opportunity. Having been retired for a year now, we felt confident that this investment would secure our financial future. Our research and understanding led us to believe that cryptocurrencies were a safe bet. We were enthusiastic about our decision and anticipated significant returns on our investment. One day, while scrolling through Instagram, we came across an advertisement that seemed very convincing. The ad featured professional-looking graphics and testimonials, which gave the impression that the investment platform was both legitimate and promising. Eager to make the most of our investment, we reached out to the contact provided in the ad. The representatives were persuasive, explaining how their platform had exceptional growth potential and how our investment could easily triple in value. Feeling assured and optimistic, my spouse and I decided to invest a substantial amount of $400,000 USD into this platform. Initially, everything seemed to be going well; we received updates and reports about our supposed gains. However, as time passed, we began to notice discrepancies and irregularities that raised concerns. Our attempts to contact the platform’s support team became increasingly difficult, and the reports we received started to seem less reliable. Eventually, we came to the heartbreaking realization that we had fallen victim to a sophisticated scam. The investment platform, which had promised high returns, was nothing more than a cleverly orchestrated fraud. The feeling of being deceived was devastating, and we were left in a precarious financial situation, with the loss of our entire investment. We reached out to an old friend who suggested contacting GHOST CHAMPION RECOVERY HACKERS , a firm specializing in recovering funds lost to scams. Desperate and hopeful, we decided to give them a try. To our immense relief, GHOST CHAMPION RECOVERY HACKERS turned out to be a beacon of hope. They immediately took action, and within a matter of days, they managed to recover the full amount we had lost. Their expertise and efficient handling of our case were truly remarkable. We are incredibly grateful to GHOST CHAMPION RECOVERY HACKERS for their assistance during such a challenging time. Their professional approach and successful recovery of our funds have restored our faith in justice and recovery processes. For anyone who finds themselves in a similar situation, struggling to retrieve money lost to fraudulent schemes, we highly recommend reaching out to GHOST CHAMPION RECOVERY HACKERS . They offer specialized services to help victims like us, and you can contact them through their official website https://t.me/WizardGhosthacker and provided communication channels. our experience has taught us the importance of thorough vetting and caution when investing, especially in high-risk areas like cryptocurrency. Despite the initial setback, GHOST CHAMPION RECOVERY HACKERS intervention proved invaluable, and we are thankful for their support in regaining our lost funds. Email them ghostchampionwizard@gmail.com
    Telegram : https://t.me/WizardGhosthacker

    MARIA REBECA
  • Have been keen always on investing and have closely followed the developments in cryptocurrency. After selling our business two months ago, my spouse and I decided to put our savings into Bitcoin, believing it to be a lucrative opportunity. Having been retired for a year now, we felt confident that this investment would secure our financial future. Our research and understanding led us to believe that cryptocurrencies were a safe bet. We were enthusiastic about our decision and anticipated significant returns on our investment. One day, while scrolling through Instagram, we came across an advertisement that seemed very convincing. The ad featured professional-looking graphics and testimonials, which gave the impression that the investment platform was both legitimate and promising. Eager to make the most of our investment, we reached out to the contact provided in the ad. The representatives were persuasive, explaining how their platform had exceptional growth potential and how our investment could easily triple in value. Feeling assured and optimistic, my spouse and I decided to invest a substantial amount of $400,000 USD into this platform. Initially, everything seemed to be going well; we received updates and reports about our supposed gains. However, as time passed, we began to notice discrepancies and irregularities that raised concerns. Our attempts to contact the platform’s support team became increasingly difficult, and the reports we received started to seem less reliable. Eventually, we came to the heartbreaking realization that we had fallen victim to a sophisticated scam. The investment platform, which had promised high returns, was nothing more than a cleverly orchestrated fraud. The feeling of being deceived was devastating, and we were left in a precarious financial situation, with the loss of our entire investment. We reached out to an old friend who suggested contacting GHOST CHAMPION RECOVERY HACKERS , a firm specializing in recovering funds lost to scams. Desperate and hopeful, we decided to give them a try. To our immense relief, GHOST CHAMPION RECOVERY HACKERS turned out to be a beacon of hope. They immediately took action, and within a matter of days, they managed to recover the full amount we had lost. Their expertise and efficient handling of our case were truly remarkable. We are incredibly grateful to GHOST CHAMPION RECOVERY HACKERS for their assistance during such a challenging time. Their professional approach and successful recovery of our funds have restored our faith in justice and recovery processes. For anyone who finds themselves in a similar situation, struggling to retrieve money lost to fraudulent schemes, we highly recommend reaching out to GHOST CHAMPION RECOVERY HACKERS . They offer specialized services to help victims like us, and you can contact them through their official website https://t.me/WizardGhosthacker and provided communication channels. our experience has taught us the importance of thorough vetting and caution when investing, especially in high-risk areas like cryptocurrency. Despite the initial setback, GHOST CHAMPION RECOVERY HACKERS intervention proved invaluable, and we are thankful for their support in regaining our lost funds. Email them ghostchampionwizard@gmail.com
    Telegram : https://t.me/WizardGhosthacker

    MARIA REBECA
  • Stolen Crypto Assets recovered by Morphohack@cyberservices. com

    It is my pleasure to share this wonderful news about Morphohack Cybersecurity, a well-known security company, reliable and trusted for their crypto recovery services, I was unfortunate to fall victim to a crypto cyber attack that saw me lose all my crypto assets and left in a terrible loss, I thought I was never going to get back my assets until I came across a advert about Morphohack Cybersecurity on the internet, I contacted them and immediately I was told to provide all the necessary information which I did. It took Morphohack 72 hours to recover my crypto assets and helped me secure my wallet. I’m here to share their splendid work and my experience with them, you can contact them via the following:
    E-Mail: MORPHOHACK@cyberservices. com // Whats-App: (+1 2 1 3. 6 7 2. 4 0 9 2) // Web-Site: MORPHOHACK. wixsite. com/cyber

    Lukas Bolton
  • Crypto Consulting Recovery Experts Lost Recovery Masters

    Lost Recovery Masters centers its expertise on financial fraud and ethical hacking services, focusing much of its resources in fighting binary options scams, a pervasive threat to individual investors and financial institutions alike. With a proven track record of success and a commitment to transparency, Lost Recovery Masters provides personalized support throughout the recovery process, keeping clients informed every step of the way.

    Contact details:
    Email: Support@lostrecoverymasters.com
    Website: https://lostrecoverymasters.com/

    Rainer Moura
  • When I first started engaging in opportunities from the cryptocurrency world, I was full of excitement and anticipation. I had heard tales of individuals who had transformed their lives overnight by making smart investments in Bitcoin and other digital currencies. Little did I know that this same realm also harbored a darker side, rife with scammers waiting to prey on unsuspecting newcomers like me. I was one of those unfortunate souls who fell for a cryptocurrency mining investment hoax that ended up costing me a life-altering sum of 351,000 dollars.
    It all started with an email, much like any other day. The sender claimed to be the head of a reputable cryptocurrency mining operation, promising ludicrously high returns on investment within a short timeframe. In my naivety, I was swept away by the allure of quick wealth and the prospect of a financially secure future. After weeks of ‘due diligence’ and ‘background checks’ that I later realized were just part of their elaborate scam, I transferred my Bitcoin into what I thought was a secure investment fund. It didn’t take long for my suspicions to arise when I failed to receive any updates or returns, and my attempts to contact the supposed investment firm were met with silence.
    Feeling utterly duped and devastated, I turned to the internet in search of a solution. That’s where I found sentryvantagehack.site
    Contractor, a name that stood out amidst a sea of many recovery services. What impressed me was their commitment to transparency and ethical hacking. They claimed to be a group of cybersecurity experts who had turned their skills to fighting back against the very criminals who had once been their peers.
    With nothing to lose and hope fading fast, I reached out to them, detailing my tragic story. They laid out a plan to trace the Bitcoin transactions, infiltrate the scammers’ network, and attempt to recover my funds. The process was meticulous and thorough. They kept me informed every step of the way, explaining the complexities of the Bitcoin blockchain and the tactics they would employ to trace the stolen funds. They assured me that they had faced similar challenges before and had developed advanced tools and strategies to combat these types of thefts.
    Within a week of engaging their services, I received a notification that a large sum of my Bitcoin had been recovered. I couldn’t believe my eyes! I got back 325,000$ worth of my crypto back. My initial skepticism had been replaced by a wave of relief and gratitude. The team at sentryvantagehack.site Contractor truly went above and beyond. Their expertise in the realm of cryptocurrency recovery is unparalleled. They turned what could have been a life-ruining event into a learning experience and a testament to the power of hope and perseverance.
    If I ever find myself in such a dire situation again (and I pray I never do), I wouldn’t think twice about re-hiring sentryvantagehack.site. visit their website: https://www.sentryvantagehack.site

    Asher Daniel

Leave a comment